The New Plan
I've decided to become a musician. The fact that I have no demonstrable musical talent may slow me down a little, but I have a list of things I would like to accomplish in my new career, which seems a good place to start.
1) Start a rap beef. I'm thinking of starting this right away with my best friend. I'm just saying it's not a good sign when you tell someone that you tried self-tanner the day before, and they squint at you and say, "Really?" Consider it on like Donkey Kong, Mary!!
2) Form a supergroup. I just like the word.
3) Have a child and name it something improbable, like Lampshade or Rockenroll.
4) "Trash" a hotel room by doing things like not neatly stacking the room service trays.
5) Insist on traveling with someone whose only job is to prevent people from making eye contact with me.
These are really just places to start. I'm sure a major label will be phoning any minute to offer me a great deal of money. Au revoir, little people!
1) Start a rap beef. I'm thinking of starting this right away with my best friend. I'm just saying it's not a good sign when you tell someone that you tried self-tanner the day before, and they squint at you and say, "Really?" Consider it on like Donkey Kong, Mary!!
2) Form a supergroup. I just like the word.
3) Have a child and name it something improbable, like Lampshade or Rockenroll.
4) "Trash" a hotel room by doing things like not neatly stacking the room service trays.
5) Insist on traveling with someone whose only job is to prevent people from making eye contact with me.
These are really just places to start. I'm sure a major label will be phoning any minute to offer me a great deal of money. Au revoir, little people!
posted by Maureen at
11:51 AM
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