Cats for sale!

I think the cats sense that something is up, what with all the cleaning and people in and out and clearing out closets and such. They have responded by increasing their clinginess and ramping up the level of destruction and mayhem.

Every day I come home and at least one closet has been opened, and the contents thrown from the shelves. The box spring has been ripped open and used as an emergency hiding place. The couch has been ripped open from underneath. I no longer smoke in the apartment, so I sit outside like a refugee while two sets of eyes glare at me from the windows. They must have overheard my conversations that I don't know what I'm going to do with them, because the resentment is clear.

I think they are sabotaging me in the hopes that the apartment will never sell. It's entirely possible that they'll get their wish, of course. I know it's only been a week or so, but I really want a contract to be signed so that I know what I'm working with timewise. Blargh.

19 years of education, and "blargh" is really all I've got. If the foregoing paragraphs make you desperate to "live the dream" and adopt one of my cats, please do not hesitate to contact me. Free to good home...free to home...free? Anyone? Bueller?